Hey everyone,
We just wanted everyone to know that we have been chosen buy a birth mom to take her little baby girl! She is due to be born August 3oth. She is 1/4 Caucasian, 1/4 Japanese and 1/2 African American. We are so excited to finally get our little baby that we have been praying for, for so long.
A couple of prayer requests; one is just that she is healthy because her birth mom has been doing some drugs while pregnant, mainly cocaine. She has quit on June 1st but we are still praying that she was protected to all she was exposed to in the womb. Another prayer request is that the birth mom does not change her mind; her name is Danielle if you want to pray for her by name. She is going to have a tough 48 hours with her, but once she signs at discharge from the hospital her rights are terminated.
Some more great news is that we have raised $16,000. Praise the Lord!! Everyone has been so generous and has blessed us in more ways than one. We still have a little more then $3,000 to raise but we are not worried at all that the Lord won't provide. He has been in this whole process with us.
We have had some heart ache in this process and times of anxiety, but God has taught us patience and how we have to trust Him or we will go crazy with worry. We are excited to meet the newest edition to our family and the girls are so excited to have a "little, little baby sister" like Jada says.
We love you all and thank you so much for all the prayers that were laid at the Fathers feet on our behalf. You guys are amazing.
"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth. This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in His presence whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and He knows everything."
1 John 3:18-20

Across the Line

We did it! We crossed the finish line. It only took us 5 hours and 22 minutes of running, and we did it!

Thank you all for your prayers, I needed them. My foot did not get better, but I was able to finish.
It was the most painful morning of my life.

I have been reflecting on the experience quite a bit since race day and will share in the next blog some of my thoughts.

Worth the Cost

Everybody asks, "why does adoption cost so much?"

Its a great question. The short answer is, because its a ton of work that requires professional help.

I think while that is a good question, its the wrong question. My question to you is what is a life worth? What is a child worth? 19,000 dollars? What price tag would you put on a baby?

The point is every life is precious. These babies are priceless. You and I can not begin to understand their value. I have met so many people who say, oh we would love to adopt, but it cost so much. That is only true if you go for private adoption, the government will pay you to raise kids in the system, but there is a different kind of cost involved there. But think about that statement, it cost to much? I know what people mean, its cost a lot of money and most people cant afford it. But is adoption your idea or Gods. If God has put adoption on your heart, whats the hold up? How big is your God?

How about this; you are on a picnic table with God, his son Jesus and a young boy sitting across from you, your spouse, and the holy spirit. So you start talking about the weather and the normal superficial stuff we wast moments on, then God interrupts the small talk to introduce this young child. "He has a question for you" God says with a soft look on his face. So you turn you attention to this young man. "Why didn't you adopt me" he asks? "I am sure you are wonderful people but I just want to know what kept me from the love and safety of your home? You see, I would cry myself to sleep every night begging God to give me a mommy and daddy, and each morning I would wake with the hope of a family only cry myself to sleep again. What kept you from me?"

How would you answer that. What would your reason be? If God has yoked you with a burden for orphans, what keeps you from being the answer to their prayers?

God loves adoption. His true Son Jesus loves adoption as well. They have adopted countless orphans. If you are in God family let me ask you this, what was your price tag?

I am so thankful that God and His son thought we are worth the cost.

If you were on that picnic table what would that conversation look like? What question would God ask you about the orphans, or widows? How about your neighbors or your enemies. Or the sick, alien, imprisoned, the lost. Have you been close enough to the heart of God to have your heart break. Have you been yoked with a burden for others that boils the marrow in your bones?

If its Gods idea, just move. He will make a way. Every life is worth the cost. Just ask the Father and His Son.

Every life is worth it.

20

Monday morning I met my brother Seth and good friend Brett for our 20 mile long run. This was to be our longest run to date. We were a little nervous, not about the distance so much, but because we were all nursing bum body parts. Seth has barely been able to train for this race due to a bad ankle, Brett has been nursing a bum knee and I have felt like I have a nail in my heal. Regardless, we all showed up at 6:30 am on the North side to conquer 20, and...

...we did it! It was not pretty, but we finished. It was a good run. Seth and Brett ended the run with their bum parts feeling pretty normal, well, as normal as you can feel after running 20 miles. I hurt my bum foot by jumping over a median while dodging oncoming traffic at the first 2 mile marker, and that started some discomfort that kind of intensified as we continued to run. I was doing OK with the bum foot and I was able to ignore the pain since I was running with my bros and having good conversations and stuff. The nerves in my foot started yelling at my brain around 14 miles, that was no fun but then the nerves shut up for a while and I was happy until about 16 miles when those same nerves in my foot started cursing at my brain. Needless to say, they sent all kinds of nasty signals the last 4 miles causing my body to slow way down. But hey, I finished. My bros waited up for me despite my pitiful pace. It was a good day.

I also discovered that I have the bladder of a tiny child, which will be interesting come race day.

I am praying that my foot will be OK come race day. Its going to be difficult enough to complete this race as a 250 pound non runner so I would rather not have to limp the 26.2 miles. We will see. I am will cross that finish line one way or another. I think some times when we step out in faith and obedience we think OK God I am ding this "good thing, aren't you proud of me" and we expect the floodgates of blessing to be opened upon us, but instead we find ourselves trudging through the valley of the shadow saying "what the heck". That's when the good stuff happens, when your chest deep in the pains and sorrows of this broken world and all you can do is extend your hand up and cry out for help. That's when God moves in us and through us. That is when He can be glorified.

If my foots gets better, its because God is good and He has answered my cry, and if it does not it simply means He got a better idea. We will see.

Waiting

We had been praying, planing, and preparing for months to welcome a little boy from Ohio into our home as our son. He was due to be born March 24th, he was induced March 25th, we waited and waited, and got a call late March 27th to find out that we would not be going to Ohio to meet our son. Needless to say we were bit bummed after months of anticipation, fundraising, marathon training, and all the fun adoption paperwork. He was born but he was not ours.

Thank God that he stayed in the arms of his mother. She could not bring herself to give him up even though she was not sure how she would make it. Her love for that boy shattered her fears of keeping him, he was born and he was wanted, that is how it is supposed to be. Baby's were knit with purpose and they are always wanted.

My wife and I are grateful for this experience of waiting, wanting and wondering what God is up to. We are thankful because we know that He is up to something wonderful and we are so honored to be a part of it.

We don't know who we are going to adopt, but we are still going to adopt. There are a lot of babies out there that need a loving home. So nothing has changed. I am still running the marathon, we are still fundraising, the fees are the same. Now we just wait for that baby who will be ours. We are excited.

God is good!

If you falter in times of trouble, how great is your strength! Proverbs 24:10

A Great Begining

Running Alone

The past two weekends I have had to run my long runs alone. The result of those agonizing hours of pounding the pavement confirmed a simple truth that I now better understand.

Life is meant to be lived in community.

We were made to journey with others. I know its simple, but it is too true to ignore. Everything is better when it's shared with others. I need my running buddies on those long run days, we pump each other up to conquer the distance, we encourage each other as were gasping for air climbing those killer hills, and we get to celebrate together at the finish line. Running is tough, long, hard, cold, painful, even boring after a few hours, but it is not nearly as miserable with friends running by your side. Yesterday confirmed this for me. After a few weeks of running alone Brett joined me for the first 12 1/2 miles of my 18 mile run, and it was great. We had some great conversation and before I knew it we were at 12 1/2 miles.

This principle is so awesome. God made us to tackle life together. That is why i am so excited about Team Silas, its not just Jen and I trying to come up with the money to make Silas ours, its a whole community of friends and family who have bought into the vision of adoption. Jen and I can not do this on our own and now we don't have too. And the story does not end when Silas is born and the fees are covered and the paper work is done. We know that so many of those on Team Silas will be a significant part of our sons development. I am so grateful for people who move when God whispers in their ear. I can't wait to tell my son how God brought him into our family through the generosity and love of a community "running" together.

I cant wait to celebrate at the finish line with our team.

Just a Training Update

So on Sunday I ran the longest I have ever run. It was a beautiful sunny day and I was with two of my best friends, my bro Seth and good friend Brett. We prayed for strength before the run and for protection over our bodies. Seth has not run since November because of a bad ankle and Brett has developed some significant knee pain and I am just fat, so you never know when something is going to break on me. Well our prayers were answered and we completed our long run. We were supposed to run 14 miles so we decided to run the second half of the Pittsburgh marathon course. It was good to see where we would be running come race day. We did however take a little detour that tacked on a little over an extra mile on to our long run, so needless to say we wear a little sore. Before Sunday our longest run was 12 miles, and we were jumping up to 14 but we accidentally ran over 15. The good news is we burnt over 2,000 calories and we all feel pretty good, our bodies are holding up. It was a good day.

So as of right now team Silas has three runners.

Me
Brett
Seth

If you would be interested in joining the running team let me know. We run real slow. The goal is to complete the race.

If you want to Join Team Silas and help in other ways just email me at
mattnjen@hotmail.com

One Layer Running

65 degrees! I love it!

I have been running in single digits for so long, this week has been awesome! I went out for my mid week run yesterday and ran 8 miles, it was wonderful. The sun was out, the wind was blowing and I was in shorts. I felt like I could run forever. It was nice to be free from the weight of the layers I usually have to wear. Its amazing what a little warm breeze and some sun on your face can do for the soul after months of winter and ice.

I think most of us live in the sun and we don't even realize it. I don't mean the literal sun of course, not here in beautiful western Pa anyway. What I mean is most of us live in a mild climate when it comes to the hardships of life. Now I know that life has its seasons and we all experience sunless seasons of ice and dark, but for most of us they are just that, seasons. Have you ever met a child who has only known winter? Could you imagine a sunless, warmthless, greenless season? I have met a few kids like that. Their life is so dark and so cold that they pile on all these layers just to survive. Its hard to live, and move, and enjoy when you are all layered up. Its fun to bundle up for a short time and hit a killer sledding hill or build an igloo, but we always rush back inside to a warm fire and hot coco. Unfortunately there are some who have no fire to thaw their hands, no coco to warm their belly, and no one to peel off the icy layers, and offer a body warm embrace.

I have seen kids come in from a life of cold, slowly peel off the layers and run in the warm rays of love. It is a righteous site to see the winter leave there eyes as they experience an unconditional warmth. NO child should be left to weather life alone, not even one. I have the power to end a winter, I just have to open my door, make some coco, and love as I have been loved.

Its still February, and the could will return, next time the wind stings your face be thankful that it is only a season, and then ask God for the chance to be the summer in someones life.
Remember, Love Moves.

Running for a new baby boy.

Jada is excited to get a new baby boy. Every time I get my running garb on she asks if I am going to bring the new baby home from my run. I tell her that I am running so that we can get a new baby in a few months, of course she does not understand the whole running to raise money process, but its awesome to see her excitement for Silas every day before my run, talk about motivation. Silas is going to have two amazing big sisters to love on him and welcome him into our home. I love my family!

11 Mile Long Run

Before training for this marathon the longest distance I had ever run in a race was the one 5-k I ran. A 5-k is like three point something miles. It was quite a feat for my husky self and one that I was quite proud of. I am still rather large and soft in the middle but my miles have gone up in a short amount of time. I am proud to announce that yesterday I completed 11 miles for my long run. I had never run a double digit distance and I am excited to say the least. It was a pretty good run, I felt good for most of it. When I started all this a while back, the idea of a 5-k was so intimidating, now my short runs are never shorter than 4 miles. In the beginning I had to start somewhere, I had to get off my but and just move.
As I was running with my running buddy (Brett) yesterday we were talking about how life is like a marathon. I believe that God give us big dreams and a desire to do great things, but He does not zap us with super Jesus powers to accomplish His work. Why, because life, it is just that, WORK. The people I admire are not supper Christians with special Jesus juice, they are marathoners and when I hear their stories I realize that there was a big crazy dream that was a result of a burden they could not shake. So in response to their burden and impassioned with a wild dream, they would begin to move, and soon, with completion of each "mile" and the stretching of their faith, they would see God provide, and they would feel His fire in their bones fueling them to live and love and move like no one else. I am not going to wake up one day suddenly the man I want to be, I have to put one foot in front of the other, even when it hurts, I just got to move.
This adoption is a dream for Jen and I. If we had our way there would be no orphans, there would be no foster care system. It sounds crazy, and impossible, which is what excites me. So our first step is this adoption, this marathon, and we will keep moving, will you move with us?

Love Moves

As I have drawn near my Father in heaven He has ever so slowly and gently opened my eyes to some things that break his heart. I have been allowed to see a glimpse of what grieves the heart of my Savior and God. My teaching pastor says that "vision is fueled by burden" and God has shared one of his burdens with me. For years now I have been wrestling with this burden and asking what do I do with it. The issue is so big.

It is estimated that there are over 140 million orphans in the world.

There are 135 thousand orphans in America.

That is a big burden.

But wait...

There are over 300 thousand churches in America.

Perhaps that is the number that breaks Gods heart the most, not the 135 thousand hoping and praying for God to give them a family but rather the 300 thousand churches full of Jesus followers that are unaware or perhaps unwilling to respond to the need and the hearts cry of these helpless little ones. Gods heart for the orphan is clear. Read James 1:27

I have heard God saying one thing to me over the past few years in light of this burden we share. He says "Matto, just move. I have broken your heart with the things that break my heart and I just want you to move. Move while your heart is still soft and while your eyes are still wet, just move. You don't need to know the plan, you don't need a map, you just need to respond by moving. My love always moves when there is a need. They will know your are mine by how you move. I am love, perfect and pure and love always moves. "

I am reminded that Jesus moved from a throne in heaven to a manger, from a manger to the aid of sick, the lost and the unwanted. My God moved His broken body up a hill to be tortured and then to die. My God moved out from the perfect presence of His father so that I could one day know the eternal warmth of His gaze. His love moved to free me. He moved to adopt me. How will I respond?

Jen and I have a indescribable love and passion for the fatherless children in this world. We don't know what the futures holds, but want all orphans to know the love of our perfect heavenly father. We are His body, He is love, and Love Moves, so Jen and I are moving too.

Has God broken your heart with something that breaks His? Will you move?